AndyBlog

Tricky Posting

I've always had a side of me that needs to be public. Right now, that side has deserted me, so I am forcing myself to do this. Big stuff is happening in my life - challenging stuff, on all fronts. Here's what those things are:

1) Health - I'm quite worried. I'm experiencing significant difficulties right now with my leg condition. Probably worse than I have led you to believe. I don't really want to say more than that - except, perhaps, that it has become a big challenge right now.

2) Mental State - I'm more concerned than I have ever been about this. I apologise publicly to all who feel I am shunning them and locking myself away. No, you're not imagining it - I really am doing this. It's not to do with me not liking you any more. It's to do with me being really depressed and going inside myself. At present, the thought of meeting up with anyone, or even going out is a matter of considerable stress. This has big implications, and I need to find a way round it. Regrettably, there are only a very few people I can spend time with right now. Please don't take it personally, I beg you. I will come through this in a little while, I know I will.

3) Divorce - Divorce is never a small issue, and I have had a double dose of it in short order. Arguably, I never properly got over my first divorce before marrying and subsequently being divorced from Liz. I have two pieces of paper that say I am divorced from these people, yet I still care for both, even though I am not in touch with Fiona at all now. Make not mistake - divorce messes with ones head, it is not good. It affects one comprehensively, and rocks everything.

4) Living Alone - I have to figure out how to do this. I have been fortunate in having wives who handled the stuff I struggle with. Being number-phobic is not as funny as some think. Sure, it is funny to laugh at me weeping because I can't handle thinking too much about numbers, but there is a serious side as well. This is just one of the challenges that living alone throws up. The other is managing to have enough money to do it. Another might be physically managing to do all the jobs required. The list gets quite long.

5) There is no five - because I do worry about being lonely. I discover I am just fine on my own and I am not craving companionship. Maybe that will come in time. I'll let you know.

So there it is. A decidedly downbeat posting - but I really did want to mark rock bottom in some way. I value this experience highly, as it gives me a real insight into the feelings surrounding depression. I believe this will aid me very much in getting alongside other people going through similar in the future. For this, I am grateful. For now, I am holding tight.

Things always get better, right?

If you're bored...

I suppose you might fill some minutes by visiting www.sheeppoopaper.com.

You see, they're Welsh, and therefore a bit funny. They make paper from sheep poo. It's a great educational resource. There are other poo-pular lines such as poo-pouri air fresheners and me & ewe cards.

Enjoy.

What could it be?

First I noticed this:

Then this, on the path outside the flat:

Also this:

Then these, on the gravel...

It's a total mystery to me, but it seems this place has been the victim of a light shelling.

ROOM at the inn...

This just in from the AFP news wire...

A hotel chain on Tuesday said it was offering couples called Joseph and Mary in Britain Ireland and Spain free accommodation this Christmas on proof of marriage and name. They said husbands and wives matching their criteria would get a night's stay on the house, but with more home comforts than the humble stable of the Christian Nativity story.
The offer, appropriately, runs between Christmas Eve to Twelfth Night (January 5, 2008). "The phrase 'no room at the inn' is something that resonates with us in the hotel business," said Travelodge operations director Jason Cotta. "Therefore this year we have decided to evoke the true spirit of Christmas and invite Mary and Joseph couples as our guests."
A Travelodge spokeswoman told us that couples will have to be married and provide proof of identity and register their names at a special e-mail address.

Monkey Business

I love my monkeys. Well, up to a point.

Now, I've never been much of a one for soft toys. I remember perhaps one light-coloured teddybear from my childhood, but I don't remember being particularly attached to it. For example, I have no idea what its name was. I could hazzard a guess a "Teddy", but it would be just a guess.

This makes all the more inexplicable my current fascination with all things soft, fluffy and monkey-based. For the last couple of years I have found myself delighted with fluffy monkeys - all of which I call "Monkey". (following on from my supposed naming scheme for cuddly toys in childhood)

Louise delighted me more than I felt able to express last Christmas, with her ultra-thoughtful present of one of the famous Jellycat monkeys. TL has followed on in this proud tradition and bestowed on me an anniversary monkey for my car. The old monkey was looking more than a little tired, and so it was time to refresh the monkey.

Interesting to note that I cast aside the old monkey without a second thought - certainly no sentimentality creeping into this new-found affectation.

See him here, kindly supporting my delightful vanilla air freshener. He's cute, and useful. Win-win.

So, if you're absolutely stuck for a present for me sometime - you could do worse than invoke the power of the monkey, to provide me with the kind of infantile joy that some have said is missing from my life.

Thanks, Liz. It's already part of the family - well, until something slightly nicer comes along in due course and I toss it callously onto the rubbish pile.

It never rains...

Liz lost her phone - she had no idea where she put it down last.

I offered to ring it for her, so it would reveal itself.

She searched some more, then decided to take me up on my offer.

I called and let it ring till the answerphone cut in.

Then she realised: It was on silent mode for when she is in school.

A further search ensued...

People like me

A woman has just dialed my telephone number, and when I answered with my name she said:

"What did you say?"

I said: "Andy Curtis - that's my name, can I help you?"

She said: "OK, I've dialed the wrong number - I'm very busy you know - I wish people like you didn't have numbers so jolly* near to the one I'm trying to dial. It wastes my time."

...SLAMM!

I'd love to know which minority grouping has, as its sole identifying characteristic "phone numbers that are quite near to ones that people actually meant to dial". Whatever that grouping is, I'm definitely one of them.

Honestly - people like me.

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*Actual expletive printed here may vary from the original one used.

Only in America...can you get a burger THIS big

Now then Matt, how does that grab you?

I like their style

Suicide Jumper on Vimeo

For lots of background on this performance piece go HERE. I like what they're doing, gives me hope.

Thanks to TL for giving me the updated link to the background info, it is now correct in the main posting. Honestly, she really is wonderful. If I hadn't married her myself, I could highly recommend her. I don't normally play favourites, but she's in my top two all-time wives already.

A new low...

Why did they put the word 'tasty' in inverted commas?

That's just plain worrying. It ranks with 'chocolate style flavouring' , 'chicken style chopped and shaped roll' and 'authentic bread-like slices'.

Ugh.