the bruise

by Liz Curtis

I’ve got a big bruise on my bottom
I was just going to sit on my chair
Half way between sitting and standing
I realised the chair wasn’t there

I thrashed my arms round rather wildly
I started to panic and then
I felt a sharp pain on my bottom
And found I was sitting again

The furniture moved to allow me
To put my bum down on the floor
Thank goodness that nothing was broken
But I felt that my bum would be sore

I gingerly checked out my body
Unsteadily got to my feet
With the furniture rearranged neatly
I managed to sit on my seat

I’ve got a big bruise on my bottom
It must have received quite a whack
With slightly red bits round the edges
It’s coloured all purple and black

I’ve got a big bruise on my bottom
I don’t mean to show off or brag
But really it is very splendid
It should be in some bruised bum mag

Comments

[Rebecca]

Would you like to show us?

[AndyC]

Yes, I have pictures...

[Jac]

I need proof!

[Liz Curtis]

I'll see what can be done.

[fave sis michelle]

poor thing looks incredibly painful

[Jack]

this is awful!!!
i can't believe i wasted 2 minutes of my life reading this!!

it is not funny and you deserve a bruise on you bottom if you write something like that!!

:)

[Liz Curtis]

No-one /ever/ deserves a bruise on their bottom, Jack. ;-)

[*****]

On The Ning Nang Nong

On the Ning Nang Nong
Where the Cows go Bong!
and the monkeys all say BOO!
There's a Nong Nang Ning
Where the trees go Ping!
And the tea pots jibber jabber joo.
On the Nong Ning Nang
All the mice go Clang
And you just can't catch 'em when they do!
So its Ning Nang Nong
Cows go Bong!
Nong Nang Ning
Trees go ping
Nong Ning Nang
The mice go Clang
What a noisy place to belong
is the Ning Nang Ning Nang Nong!!

By Spike Milligan

[Sumayyah Ashraf]

oh my gosh!!!it is a bit unfair on you but it
is very,very,very disgusting,the rude words you've wrote,oh my gosh!!!!!!!!!